MISTAKES I’VE MADE ALONG THE WAY

The hair JourneyI believe there are two ways to learn from other people.  You can learn from what a person has done right and you can also learn from the mistakes they have made.
In this post, I will set out some of the mistakes I’ve made over the years on my hair journey.

Mistakes I’ve Made With Research

I’ve said time and again that I spent 3 months researching before I officially started my hair journey. The key mistake I made at the beginning of my journey was that I ignored some aspects of the research.
For instance, I carried on using sulphate shampoos. I thought that since I would be deep conditioning afterwards, the harshness of the sulphates on my hair would be overridden.
Also I carried on blow drying with heat. I thought surely heat once a week can’t be that bad.
However, I noticed a vast difference in how my hair felt and progressed when I cut out direct heat and switched to sulphate free shampoos.

Mistakes I Made With Technique

I did not review and update my techniques as I progressed on my hair journey.
Up to when I was APL, I could wash my hair without putting it in braids.  When my hair got longer,  it would tangle badly on wash days.  Rather than reviewing my regimen,  I  would spend hours detangling my hair. However when I started to lose more hair than I was comfortable with  I was had to re-evaluate the situation. I realised that the only thing that had changed was the length of my hair.
I did a little research and quickly learned that longer hair tends to tangle more than shorter hair on wash days and that a way to overcome this was to wash it in box braids (calabar). I tried it out and it worked like a charm.
Ladies as you progress on your hair journey,  when a product or technique is no longer working for you; review, regroup and carry on.

Mistakes I Made With Products

There are two mistakes I made with hair products.

1)The first is that I did not give some products enough chance. I gave up on them and later realised that I had been using them incorrectly, eg, using too much or too little of the product.

2)The second mistake I made with products is that I gave up on products that worked well on my hair because they contained some ingredients I was trying to avoid like mineral oil and petroleum.
I switched from a conditioner that contained them to one that didn’t. The new one did not seem to work for my hair so I tried other conditioners that didn’t contain petroleum or mineral oil. Again they just didn’t seem to do much for my hair, so I went back to my Motions Moisture Plus which seems to keep my hair happy even though it contains some ingredients I am not too keen on.
My advice when it come to products is this: always try the products that are mineral oil and petroleum free first, if they are not working for you and you have a product that works for you but contains mineral oil/petroleum,  you can go back to using it BUT keep an eye out for a better product, ie one that doesn’t contain such ingredients and works well on your hair.

Mistakes I Made With Styling

When my hair was shorter there were so many cute protective styles I could have rocked but didn’t because I was too focused on growing longer hair. Now when try to create some of those styles it doesn’t look quite right.

Mistake I Made About Black Hair

Early on in my hair journey, I thought that when my hair became long and healthy I would be able to do all the things you aren’t supposed to do to black hair.
I thought I would be able to use a curling iron every day, and leave it down all the time and comb it till my hand ached. For some reason I thought being successful on a hair journey would give me a licence to do all these things to my hair.
Healthy black hair is still BLACK HAIR!
Healthy black hair (relaxed or natural) is still delicate, cannot tolerate heat abuse, must still be handled with care and protected.  Being on a hair journey will not turn the hair you grow to Brazilian, Peruvian or hair of another race.

The point of hair journey (in my opinion) is that at last, all the myths about black hair can be set aside and we as black women LEARN to give our hair what it needs.

So if you are natural, be aware of what your hair needs and how to take care of it.
If you are relaxed,  learn what relaxed hair needs and how to take care of it.
The same applies to ladies with coloured or locked hair.

Off course their are black ladies out there who wash their hair with anything and always wear it down and don’t even deep condition but still have butt length hair. These ladies are exceptions, I think we all no too well what happens to a lot of us when we don’t care for our hair.

I hope you  learn something from my mistakes.
Happy hair journey ladies.

X

Lade

Learn | Change | Grow.

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8 Comments

  1. Tolu
    December 12, 2013 / 4:23 pm

    Hmm, i’ve been waiting for this post for a while. Thanks for sharing. I’ve realised that the whole hair journey is about changing your mindset. There’s no “This is the way”, each person has to work out their route and re-strategise when the need arises as you said. I think my biggest challenge down the line would be impatience but seeing people with hair like yours is inspiring so i guess i’ll just keep up the healthy habits and pray they pay off.

    • omolade
      December 28, 2013 / 10:44 am

      Dear Tolu, you are becoming my favourite reader. I appreciate you taking the time to comment, feedback and share your thoughts.
      You hit the nail on the head, a hair journey is definitely about changing our mind set and attitude to our hair.
      I understand about the impatience. That was an issue for me as well for the first year and half of my journey, especially cos I didn’t seem to be getting much progress length wise. Persistence on a hair journey pays off so hang in there. Health before length always.
      x
      Lade

      • Tolu
        December 30, 2013 / 11:35 am

        😀

  2. Fadesola
    December 17, 2013 / 12:22 pm

    Nice post as always. Did you use any growth aid throughout your hair journey? If yes which one did you use or would advice me to use? I am asking because am keeping track of my hair growth and i noticed that my hair grows less than half an inch each month is it normal?
    Thank you

    • omolade
      December 28, 2013 / 10:58 am

      Thank you Fadesola

      No I have never used any growth aides. I thought about it and decided it wasn’t necessary. But I have no issue with anyone who choses to try growth aides. What ever works for you.
      Well done on keeping track of your hair growth, I do that too. The average growth rate is half an inch a month, some ladies get more, some ladies get less. So I would say it may be normal for you to grow less than half an inch a month.
      Eat right, drink enough water, exercise and stay fit to ensure you are giving your body all the nutrients it needs.

  3. Subuola Akinkugbe
    December 29, 2013 / 4:53 pm

    Lade it’s Subu. I am around at the moment. I promoted your hair growth pic on my Instagram. Catch you later. I messaged you via BBM on. Titi’s phone. Ta

  4. January 15, 2014 / 6:09 am

    Thank you for providing us with this post. It is always interesting and insightful to learn from others successes as well as failures. One big mistake that I made (even though I had done research) involved moisture-protein balance. On one occasion I had a horrible set-back from protein overload (incorrect usage, I left the protein treatment overnight like I would a moisturizing treatment). After such set-back I always told myself and others that my hair was protein sensitive and that I wouldn’t use protein. Lo and behold in August, my hair began to break off/shed more than it’s normal rate. It was not until 2 months or so ago that I attributed my loss to improper moisture-protein balance and reincorporated protein in my regimen. I am very thankful I did this and even began to wondered why I thought my hair was protein sensitive in the first place.

  5. July 4, 2016 / 1:09 pm

    Dear Lade, weldone… I’m new here and I’m interested in the hair journey… I started making my hair in 2011 and up till date it’s has not even reached the neck length, though I stay up to 4 month before relaxing, but I still don’t see any difference… I need you to help me on this, I used mega growth profective relaxer cremé on my hair in December and it rli damaged my hair, so in January, I steamed the hair and made dread locks (synthetic), I removed it in may, though I wash it… And fix my hair then I want to relax it now cause it’s almost 7months since I last relaxed… I scared of not seeing any difference this time, though I want to steam it after relaxing then wait for two weeks before making it… Pls I need you to advice me on what to do because the new growth is now long and difficult to come through

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